“Prostitutes wear short clothes.”
“You are a hooker for talking to boys, hanging out with them, and oh my god, for having a boyfriend.”
“What a slut for rejecting me.”
“Whore for having sex before marriage or talking to other men after marriage.”
“Slut for having a career and moving forward in it.”
“Arrogant bitch and prostitute for ignoring men before or after marriage”
The list goes on!
No matter what I do or do not do, I am a prostitute!
The first time a woman or a girl has to hear, it traumatizes her for a lifetime. No matter how strong she is or must have fought back, she is again a prostitute. What’s ironic is the society sees prostitution or prostitutes as a shame.
When I Was Insulted and Abused
We are so blinded by this sentence that we often forget how the real picture is. Hence, it’s easy for people to use this word as an insult and a trauma for us women.
The first time I was called a prostitute was because I spoke in English to my classmates and smiled at them. The second time, when I stood against those six boys who often pulled my bra strap, blew flying kisses, touched my skirt to pull it up, did sexual actions to tease me, and the ones who tried to molest me. The third time, when I had rejected the proposal of a popular boy in school. The fourth, when I got into my first relationship. The fifth time, for sharing this very traumatizing detail with my peers. The sixth, for refusing a boy to get into my pants. The seventh, when I opened up about the physical violence in my family. The counting and incidents do not end here, not for me, not for other women.
One-word, different synonyms, but it never stopped. What truly ended was the disrespect for the word prostitute for me. I have a whole new perspective after I realized how prostitution is actually run.
A Closer Look at Reality
‘She Sleeps With People for Money’
Wait! Did you know she was sold into prostitution by her very own father or uncle? She was hardly 7 or 8 or 12 or even 2 when she was raped by men of all ages- the ones that looked like her brother, the ones that seemed like her grandfather. She bled alone in that dark room with a door but no exit way; she was groped and hit and starved until she accepted her fate to their faces; her uterus was damaged and hanging out because some man was drunk raping her uncontrollably. Then, the doctor who examined her mercilessly raped her again, saying, ‘you are a prostitute, you are a sold thing, and you are to serve all.’
The Other Side of the Story
She was barely twenty and the only household wager, so she sold herself in the arms of those who fed her family. But she cried every night to the very haunting thought that she will have to fall into new arms for daily bread, even to educate her little siblings or daughter and buy sanitary wear for her mother. She was beaten to death when she tried to escape, and her body laid in the pile of bodies that once tried to escape the hell of earth. She is coerced into silence while her mind screams ‘help’ every second.
It’s sexual slavery, not a chosen path. In India, for example, where the caste system is strong, girls from certain castes are pushed into prostitution from a young age, many times by their mothers. This is the reality of the term ‘Prostitute.’
Let’s Put an End to the Trauma!
Being called a prostitute, slut or whore is no longer traumatizing for me; instead, the reality of this profession, the uncountable usage of this word as an insult or joke, the never-ending cycle of this pain, traumatizes me.
I am a prostitute for talking to men, for engaging myself in relationships I approve of, for following career lines instead of settling down, for calling out people who make me feel uncomfortable, for wearing what I like, and for everything how you relate the word prostitute to.
Amid the increasing haws and hushes, let’s end the insult attached to the word “prostitute,” and it may put an end to at least one trauma in the world.